Well, it’s a beautiful day in Houston today. It has been remarkably cold all week, and I’ve been in a pretty crappy mood. Sleeping till 11 and taking naps during the day- ugh. I really look forward to the weekends, because I’m not as sleepy. I don’t know if my energy comes from not having radiation or from being excited for not having to go. lol.
Anyway, this weekend was great. Yesterday Candice, Joanna, my mom & I went to Andrea’s house to look at the backyard (for my wedding). It’s just as perfect as I remember. Al & I are going to have a very elegant and simple wedding. Andrea and her mom were super helpful too. Times a’ tickin’. How cute is it that our wedding is at 2:17 pm because that’s the date he proposed? 🙂
In other wedding news, that 15 pounds I gained from the steroids after surgery? Totally doesn’t look like a 5 month pregnancy anymore. It was so frustrating that I couldn’t workout because I had soooo many limitations. I still do. I tried to run today- no ma’am. But my two best friends (Joanna & Candice) did walk a mile and a half with me. So I still have the extra weight, which I love, but I’m working it out. *high-fives self*
Yesterday morning I looked in the mirror and noticed that the left side of my forehead where I get radiation has a very dark spot. I read that your skin changes during radiation, and usually changes back afterwards. I got sad for a minute because I was thinking, I’m not even halfway through and it’s sooo dark compared to the rest of my face! But whatever, it is what it is.
Anyway, my memory is off due to brain surgery, and even more so because of radiation. Needless to say, all three pair of my glasses have been (hopefully temporarily) misplaced since January, and I’ve essentially been walking around blind. I hate wearing contacts. My eyes are super dry. This morning Candice, Joanna & I were at Cracker Barrel and I thought the lady across the way from me kept staring at my head (scar, etc.), but I couldn’t 100% tell because I didn’t have my contacts/glasses on. So before she left, instead of walking out the appropriate way she walked towards me, stood RIGHT next to me, and just looked down at my head and then walked off (the normal way)! I was extremely offended because like, how rude can you be? But she left her Bible at the table and I grabbed it and went to give it to her and talk to her about it.
For the better though, I could only find her husband- who I was extremely polite to. I just found it repulsive how she was blatantly staring at my head. If you want to ask why the side of my head is bald, ask.
When I first found out I was going to have radiation, I thought, I might lose all my hair so I should either shave my head or buy a wig. Due to my obsession with my hair, I bought a wig, but after today I decided I’m never wearing it again. I was going to throw Mindy (that’s what I call my wig) away, but Candice and Joanna said to not be irrational and just wear it when I want or don’t wear it at all. I can be really self-conscious, but losing hair, temporary dark spots, getting a walker because of fatigue… that’s nothing to be ashamed of, and I guess that’s why I wanted a wig. I don’t want to look sick. I think people who make rude comments or make you feel uncomfortable are probably just ignorant, so maybe this can be a learning experience for the both of us.